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Very interesting discussion right now between Kay, Singy, and Flaherty. (Seriously.) Of course, Penny drills ARod in the back immediately, and we're 15 minutess into the game with a warning issued to both sides.


Ok, I've never really thought too much about the rules governing the warning policies. But I gotta say this little back and forth between the YES announcers is making me really think about this more. It's the top of the 1st, 4 batters in and there's a warning issued to both benches.


"The bullet's been taken out of the Yankees' chamber," says Singy. They can't retaliate at all unless they want their ace yanked from the hill.


Kay chimes in that it will now affect how CC pitches, he's not gonna want to pitch inside at all for fear of accidentally losing the ball, hitting the batter, and the ump ruling it intentional.


Hm. Never looked at it that way. Thanks, Kay.


That might be the first time I've ever expressed that sentiment.


!! And then I hear "Hideki beats out the throw." 2 statements I've never heard in my life. In the span of 20 minutes! Today truly is a special day.


I'm really digging Cervelli behind the plate. He's got some confidence and fluidity for rookie, and he really paces his battery mates well. I love how he jumped outta the box when Ortiz clearly went on a checked swing, to sell the call. He's doing a great job with CC.



But poor CC, he probably just wants the offense to score a few runs so he can get outta the game and inhale a couple dozen cold cut heroes.


Holy. Shit. Are you kidding me, Damon. Please please please tell me that you only did that to make Swisher feel better about yesterday.


YANKEES. What is WRONG with you this week? Swisher is playing like a moose on acid. You're striking out against pitchers who you should be teeing off on.


I was watching The Devil's Rejects the other night at 4am because I'm normal, and there's a part in it when one of the Reject victims tries to fight back and escape her hostage situation by stealing Baby's gun. And so Baby is all encouraging her to go ahead and shoot her, only for the victim to pull the trigger and no shot is fired:


"Stupid bitch. Ain't no bullets in that thing. It was all fucking mindpower."


And that's how I feel right now watching this game. What happened to the confident juggernaut I've been delighting in for the past few weeks? They weren't just winning, they were making winning look effortless. I went from hopeful anticipation to confident expectations. I realized that when I turned on the game, I just assumed they'd win. And not in a cocky way. But in a confident, convinced way.


Sweet Christ. Kay just told us a little known fact, that...wait for it..."The Yankees are 1,741 and 0 in Yankee Classic games. They have never lost."


So clearly Elias decided to use their June floating holiday today.


And here's Nick Swisher. "He's had somewhat of a baffling series...some interesting baserunning choices..." I think the YES announcers are taking their criticisms too much to heart. It's like they've been going out of their way lately to debunk the allegations that they're not exactly objective.


Earlier in the game Kay just went to town on Wang. (Oh, God. I know. I know what I said.) He just was incredulous and quite bemused at the fact that Wang's ERA in 5 starts is the highest in MLB history.


"And it gets worse! ERA has been around since 1913. And in ALL that time, Wang has the absolute worst. In history. I mean, I was just shocked when I heard Girardi said he wanted to sleep on it before deciding on Wang's future as a starter. To me, it's a no-brainer."


I agree with Kay.


Great job, Swish. Too bad no one is grounding out in the infield today. Is Kevin Long guzzling boat drinks with the Elias boys somewhere?


2-23 in the series with RISP. That's really disgusting. I've seen better ratios for NHL shots on goal.


Flaherty just said that "you wouldn't know it but Varitek has a very funny personality." I cannot think of worse testimony to someone's humor than a ringing endorsement from John Flaherty.


And great job, Matsui for watching the called strike. Matsui is starting to play like he doesnt understand the game. Like he just looks very confused about everything. Maybe he should learn some f'n English. It may not help, but it CERTAINLY WON'T HURT EITHER.


Ha, Melky just ran about 78 miles to nab a fly ball in front of Damon. Thank you.


Man, CC's been looking so phenomenal lately. When did he last have a bad start? And you know who else needs a nod for his amazingly sharp defense? JETER. I definitely missed the call on that one.


AND THE GAME IS TIED AT 1.


Melk and rookies hit the spot! Cervelli brings home Melky whose baserunning skills have literally done a 180 in the past few years. He used to wheel around the diamond like he's Jack Nicholson in the voodoo doll scene in "The Witches of Eastwick."


And here we go, ok. Ok. The Yanks are putting people on. I like what's going on here. As long as they're not just doing this to fulfil their "destination" of leaving them all on base.


ARod up. With 2 outs. In Fenway. With 2 on. This is it. This is where he shuts everyone the eff up in Boston. He's due. He's gotta be. By Byron's logic, he can't just suck at Fenway all year, he's gotta maintain his career average and hence needs to have a couple of big base hits to keep things aligned with his standard.


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WHICH HE DOES. 2 RUN DOUBLE!!! 3-1!!!!!


THANK YOU A-ROD! 2 outs! Not a clutch hitter, my ass. Were we up by 18 runs then, Beantown losers? No? So would you say that he choked or came through? Uh, sorry, what was that? Did I hear a niner in there?


Man, did they need that. For the sake of the game, for the sake of momentum, their confidence, their fans, their chemistry, and most of all, for the sake of CC.


Swish down looking. Sigh. Where is your head? My mom called me today to say, "Dad and I were watching the game last night and we decided we do NOT want Swisher as a son-in-law if he can't even make a simple catch like that." I can always rely on Mom to boil things down to the most fundamental significance.


WOW. What a catch by Baldelli! Just made an unreal diving catch to rob Melk of an extra base hit with a man on. Well played, kid. That was so impressive that if I was at Fenway, after my initial groan, I'd have to applaud that. And then swallow my own tongue. And then work on remedying the obvious lobotomy that must have taken place that would have directed me to the city of Boston in the first place.


The rain continues to come down pretty hard, and I feel like there must be some kind of special rule for Fenway. They just seem like a club that will end up having the rules bent to their favor, a la the refs in the Orlanda series doing everything in their power to facilitate a Lakers W. I mean, the Sux somehow managed to pull off a W after losing, in a game in 1941:

Aug. 15, 1941: Twelve days after Washington beat Boston 6-3 in a rain-shortened game, AL president Will Harridge awarded the visiting Red Sox the victory, saying that the Senators violated rules by not covering the field.


Kay marvels at how the Fenway Douches had the foresight to handle the inclement weather.

"And the fans came prepared! Look at all of em, in garbage bags..."


...



Too easy.


And in the time it took me to check my work email, the Red Sox have taken the lead in the bottom of the 8th. ROAR. Not good. The 8th inning is usually when the Yanks stage their comeback, the 9th is a little trickier. Although I gotta say, for all the gushing praise over the Sux bullpen, I'm really not too impressed.


But then again, as a Yank fan, I can't really lambaste any team's bullpen. Every time I think of our relievers, the first name that comes to mind is Sean Henn. They all just seem like Henn Clones (Clenns). Fantastically mediocre. Ineffective. Unreliable. Generic. Indistinguishable. The only thing this guy had going for him was Yogi Berra's advocacy. Which Yogi attributed to "liking his name." Of course.


So I just turned the tv off for 5 minutes because I couldn't stomach watching the Yanks try to get out of the inning with the Clenns on the mound, 0 outs, and bases loaded. And I just flipped it back on to see one of said Clenns throwing a swinging strike 3 to end the inning and keep the damage to "only" a 1-run lead.


Time to see what kind of 9th inning magic they can pull out.


Jeter grounds out. 1 down.


Damon flies out. 2 down.


Not very magical so far.


Tex lines out. End of game.


Grumble grumble. Well, on the bright side, my disappointment has diminished each game. Like last night, I'm not really worried. Just very confused. Kay, yet again, says what I'm thinking for the 3rd time tonight: "It's almost inconceiveable that a Yankee team this good could lose 8 straight games without a win against the Red Sox."


Like Iowa Jeff said, it doesn't really bother me that it's against the Sux. Or that we've gone overfeated against them. The only thing that bothers me right now is the 2 game deficit in the AL East. Which, of course, is very surmountable. But still. I'd rather be on top. (T.W.S.S.)


Which I know will happen because I saw a sign today.


On the front half of the truck it said NEW YORK. But the portentious feature is Boston's address. SECOND STREET.


And final 2 thoughts:


1.) Swisher lost the last 2 games for us. I'm still cukoo for him, though.


2.) I was just thinking about the fight I got into the guy with the beret last night, and his 2 loser friends. And the reason we start to exchange words in the first place is because they start cheering when Jeter strikes out. After not watching the game for 8 innings. And upon inquiry, they inform me that they're just rooting for strikeouts, because they "like pitchers" and that "striking someone out is the hardest thing to do in sports." False. But that's immaterial. Who roots for strikeouts? So I roll my eyes and mumble, "Ugh. That's so gay."


"WHAT'S WRONG WITH BEING GAY??"


"Jesus, ok I'm sorry. Nothing. That's so LAME. Yikes. Are you Yankee haters or something?"


Beret guy chirps, "They just like pitchers but I hate the Yankees. I don't follow baseball at all. I just hate the Yankees."


Ok. So what is the difference between me saying, "That's so gay" and them hating a team they know nothing about? Isn't it the same principle of "discriminating" against a sect for no reason beyond a preconceived notion of the faction? NOT that I was discriminating. But I'm just saying. I don't disparage homosexuals. Why are these guys allowed to disparage the Yankees? Who decided what social populations and groups get to have a super Adventures of Zelda-like master shield? Because for all the shit the Yankees take, they should be able to cash in on one of them, too.


Putting this week behind me...moving on to the Mutts...

3 Comments:

  1. Jeff said...
    Tssk, tssk .... Does Iowa have to teach everyone tolerance? You obviously need to watch the latest Ad Council commercials.

    There's a lot you can learn from PSA's that would've helped you last night, like ... stand up for yourself, go over there, and give him a good smack. Fight! Fight! Fight!
    Crazy Yankee Chick said...
    I have TONS of tolerance! It just slipped! But how come I get in trouble for that when they're allowed to talk shit about another group of people they know nothing about it?
    Jeff said...
    Yeah, I don't know... I don't make the rules. I'm a middle class white male. I spend most of my time apologizing for my existence.

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