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HEY, IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORSE!!!!

RARELY will you see me shortchange the readers like this, but I'm sorry. This game is not one I want to think about for much more than a few minutes. It's one thing to lose. It's another thing to get shut out. And it's another thing to get shut out by the worst offense in the league.


The Yanks spent their Friday nights getting embarrassed by the Mariners. What a way to start the weekend, no? AJ Burnett continues to drive us all crazy, but whenever he makes me start pulling my hair out, I think of friend-of-the-blog, T-Boss.


A guy who when I first met him told me AJ is his favorite player, and told me that when he went to a Yankee game and tried to get an AJ tshirt across the street from the stadium, they said they were sold out, so he agreed to settle for a Swisher tshirt.


Then upon pulling the tshirt from him bag after leaving the store, it was weirdly an AJ shirt. I don't know what this means, but something good, I think. Plus, I just love the fact that AJ is his favorite player.


I think if T-Boss endorses the guy, then there's something there worth having faith in.


Last night, however...not his best work.


He was just ALLLL over the place.


It didn't help that King Felix is becoming just as much of a pain in the ass as Cliff Lee in terms of antagonizing the Yankees.


But, also, I have to say, watching the Yanks get whiffed one after another...well, I think there's some placebo effect going on here, too. Like they're psyching themselves out. Kind of like me playing poker and going all in. "Who cares, I'm never gonna win, let me just treat every hand in Hail Mary fashion."


Similarly, the Yanks swung at EVERYTHING. Terrible pitches, good pitches. It didn't matter. It was like the were thinking, "This guy f'n owns us, let's just swing as hard as we can and hope luck is on our side and the bat accidentally hits the ball."


This tactic was wildly fruitless.


4 hits in the whole game, 11Ks, and King Felix worked through the order like a laser beam through a cotton ball. I really like this pitcher for some reason. It seems like the kind of guy that would piss me off, because his hat is always a little off, but I think that's one of the reasons I like him. I have no idea why. Ah, the heart has its reasons...


Conversely, AJ (of the bad persusasion) went 7 IP, giving up 12 hits and 2 bombs (both to Russell Branyan). He *only* walked 3. I'm sort of surprised he stayed in for as long as he did. I seriously just do not get Girardi. Just like how my dad just doesn't get brisket.


(From a May 12 recap):

Detroit really wasn't much more effective, but their chincy bats were able to cough up 2 meak runs. Javy was brilliant. I don't get it. I just don't get this game. Much in the same way that my dad once announced--his voice drenched in troubled malcontent--"I just don't GET brisket." He was staring at our dinner with this complete look of defeat and confusion.

So that's the game for you. Yanks fanned, Mariners didn't. Arod left game (again) with more pain in his calf. Ugh.

Oh, and Cervelli needs to calm the f down. His rampant excitability was always one of my favorite parts about him, but now I'm thinking he's acting like the psychopath in "Dead Man on Campus."

PUMP. THE. BRAKES.

Cmon, Yanks. Let's take the next 3. This is Seattle, for God's sake. You're better than this.

1 Comment:

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