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There's some quote mistakenly attributed to Einstein that says insanity is defined by doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. (Is that the official opening line of the MIT valedictory address every year?) I used to give Torre a hard time for insisting on pitching a horrendous bullpen neophyte in a tied 9th inning, ignoring historical evidence that demonstrates that they'll blow the game and the master plan to get to Mo in the 10th never materializes.

But I can't get too down on Torre because apparently I do the same thing. And even though eating Thai/Mexican has shown to throw me into some kind of bizarro fit of hives and wheezing and weird marble-sized bumps that pop up around my eyes, I still insist on eating it. Brilliant. I'm watching the game right now through little eye slits that look like someone stuck a basketball pump in my temple and went to town.

I havent even thrown out the leftover Thai in question that landed me in this mess in the first place. People smoke and drink all the time even though it's bad for them and gets them into trouble. What's the difference between that and eating allergy-inducing fare?

I'm not liking the looks of this game already, but in the back of my mind I'm thinking it has all the trappings of one of those games like May 16, 2006. I don't have the strength for a night like that. It'd be great if it had all the trappings of a night like June 2, 2009.

"Paul O'Neill," says my sister, "is a dinosaur. No, not a dinosaur. Tom Hanks in big. He is on the wrong planet." There's a 5 minute segment on Paul O'Neil trying to figure out how to use the screen-writing-gadget, which he needs to outline the path Johnny Walker takes around the digital scoreboard lining the upper tier.

"He's runs that thing in 3! I'd say faster than Brett Gardner."

Yep. Check. No complaints here, "Poison Pete" (as Kay nicknames him) jinxes the Sux no-no bid. (Relax, Sux fans. It was only 5 innings. Settle down.) Why do I even draft Boston players? I could have used Beckett's CG, but I'd much rather see him implode. Same goes for Crapelbon.

Petitte looked atrocious this game, and he was getting zero help from his offense. Maybe the Yanks just don't fare well in the rain anymore. Last game I remember them looking this sleepy was a week ago during another wet one.

And if Petitte's 6 walks was a microcosm of the game's defense, then Hideki's at-bat in the 5th was representative of their offense, when he pulled a Manny vs Mo and watches 1-2-3 perfect strikes sail by, letting the bat rest comfortably on his shoulder the entire time. Um, well played, Godzilla. Thanks for coming out.

The Yankees have stranded approximately 94 runners this game. I'm not kidding.

How is someone named Scott Feldman mowing down our lineup? And Petitte can't get the ball over the plate? If we weren't gluing players to the bases, I wouldn't even know I was watching the real Yankees.

The difference in their overall performance was so drastically different than their recent showings, the dynamic was off, the chemistry not there. The missing piece? Teixeira, who was out of the game due to a sore ankle. I've said it once, and I'll say it again: the value he has to this club is undoubtedly immeasurable.

And I've never, ever, ever been one to disparage ARod, but I gotta say, not impressed with his bat today. Particularly with bases loaded and 1 out. Swung at ball 4 and grounded into DP. Would've been looking at a total different ball game had he just held off. Bad knowledge, Alex. Even with my vision compromised by slug-sized eyelids, I could still see that pitch was off the plate.


  1. Frank said...
    Oh Jack talk Thai. Jack talk Thai very well
    Crazy Yankee Chick said...
    Wow that's amazing. So much love, and yet also, so much information.

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