"It's great to be young and a Yankee."

Status meeting this morning concluded with “Kris, first thing you do when you get back to your desk, read your email.” Fantastic.

I’m expecting to see some kind of “inaccurate data/claims” email which is the absolute worst thing that could ever land in my inbox. Even worse than this.

But instead, I get back to my desk and find this:

Wow. Poor form, Shadow Ninjas. Taking advantage of whoever milo is. Bad dog.

Which made me go back to gmail and take a trip down Yahoo Fantasy Baseball trade lanes. My favorites have ALWAYS come from HGH Factory, the long standing commish—unapologetic, shameless, and undaunted in his proposals.

Last year he was hellbent on Brandon Phillips. Like BP was the missing piece in his pantheon of power, and there was absolutely nobody but the Reds’ 2B that could make his team complete.

Which led to offers like:



These in turn led to my sister and I proving why girls aren’t invited to play in fantasy leagues:



And the following trade was made. (Notice my sister’s comment underneath.)


But at least HGH Factory (Byron) engages in trades, none of the other guys in the league will go near me or my sister’s teams with a 10 foot pole.



Although ONCE in a while, I’ll get a seemingly normal trade but really it’s suspect. And Carl Crawford is untouchable. Everyone has 1. HGH’s is Hanley Ramirez. My sister’s is A-Rod. Red Sox Dynasty is all the Red Sox, except for any offered to him from a girl in the league.



Then there was the trade that went down in the books as the league’s most divisive, incendiary transaction. To be fair, I was 100% at fault.

First I get this offer and bullets have left guns slower than my rejection response.

Then artsnfartncrafts follows it up with this one:


And I reject it. I don't really know why, but I have a feeling all I saw was 2 Yankees and the Untouchable, and was outraged someone would ever suggest something so preposterous.

So, that email was sent on August 17, 2007. Here’s what those 3 jilted jerkoffs did on August 19, 2007:


I really did artsnfartsncrafts a favor. I don’t know why he got so angry.

So when I offered him this innocuous trade a week later to make amends, it took a lot of grumble grumbling from him to accept it.


Other notable ones in the docket: