"It's great to be young and a Yankee."

I don't know where to start, I'm sorry but I'm too fired up about this Galagarra bullshit to even focus on the Yankee game.

Here are some quick points:

• The Yanks showed ZERO mercy today. The O's should have relished that 3-1 loss, because it was nothing compared to the brutality bestowed upon pitcher Bergeson, who was roughed up by 7 hits in 2 innings.

• It was really just a parade of pitchers meekly stumbling out of the bullpen and then out of the game. A revolving door of inefficacy. Kinda like all the contenders trying to narfle the garthok.

• Actually, all these pitchers coming in to pitch 2 a piece is really just indicative that the O's are visionaries: someday all pitchers will pitch every day. Each starter will go 2 and only 2.

• Speaking of durable starters, Hughes went 7 and gave up only 1 run, and I swear to God, his curve ball gets more and more poetic every game he pitches. He's so good, not just because his pitches keep improving but because his feel for which one to throw is so intuitive. He's cultivated an understanding of the batters and a mature power of perception that is going to make him virtually unhittable by the end of the season. HUZZAH!

• Yanks were 5-14 with RISP. They collected 15 hits on the day, including 3 from Cano (his 16th straight safely hitting), and his I-don't-know-what day of outrageous overall ability. Seriously, it seems like he just takes leaps and bounds with not just his hitting, but his fielding, running, pitch selection, EVERYTHING. The Yankees are made of gods.

• I mean, how else can you explain Grandy skipping off the DL and straight into the lineup without so much as missing a beat? Not only that, but it's like the whole can't-hit-against-lefties thing has been this urban legend invented by Detroit to make him undesirable or something to other teams. Good thing we called their bluff.

• Oh, can we talk about Posada's BASE RUNNING ABILITIES for a second? Yeah, that's right. You heard me. Posada, the guy who couldn't beat a 3-toed sloth (which is called an "ai" for you Scrabble enthusiasts)...Posada, the guy out with a sore foot...yeah that guy nearly caught up with Cano around the basepaths. The Yankees are officially nuts. Either that, or he had the basic Rookie of the Year physical therapy.

So there's that. Now I will bang on my keyboard for the next 6 hours about how umpires make me want to throw bleach around with wild abandon.*


*Yeah, yeah. I know Jim Joyce apologized. But it means little to me. Because even if he wasn't out by a mile, even if it was just a close call, the fact he called him safe says to me that he WANTED to make that controversial call. He didn't want Armando to have the glory. He wanted to bring the attention on him.