"It's great to be young and a Yankee."

Ok, so here's the thing. I have ZERO idea of what went on today. I slept in the office, woke up on the floor with a metal file cabinet drawer 2 inches from my nose, quasi covered by a Yankees fleece blanket that I got for signing up for a credit card at the game that I only signed up for to get the blanket, and surrounded by piles of papers.

This isn't even a drunk story. I knew what I was doing. I can't wake up without my alarm, my alarm broke, and hence the only solution was to sleep in the office.

And I'm still here.

I heard about 45 seconds of the game, and everything else was based on a sporadic bbm from my sis "Hip hip Jorge!" or a game update email from Ocho Ocho:

"aaaaaaarrrrrrrrhhhhhhggghhhhhh

gghghghghghgh!!! teixiera was SAFE but called out!!!
the YESMO proved it! SAFESAFESAFE!"

And that's all I got. Seriously. I had the radio on in my office, but I didn't even get to listen to it. It's a bad Saturday when you are longing for the cacaphonous stylings of Sterling and Waldman.

Mitre was terrible, and I'm actually pretty surprised I didn't get any texts from Kevin weighing on this. He's usually Mitre's biggest (only?) supporter. But I guess I can't that much stock in his allegiances since he also is an unapologetic advocate of Sidney Ponson.

Tex went deep 2x, Jorge once, and Arod none. You know what pisses me off? That I'm already hearing people invalidate the 600 record. He hasn't even hit his 600th HR, and people are ALREADY saying how it doesn't count.

"Whatever, YOU don't count." That's what I want to say to them.

That'll show 'em.

PS, Kyle Davies... you got LUCKY.

Or did you? You're back to irrelevance, buddy. Should have given up the ding and hung on the coattails of greatness...

So that's all I got tonight. I'm really sorry. I need a drink. And by drink, I mean a beirut game.

HOWEVAH, I'll be ok tomorrow night. I'm just saving myself for the big 6-0-0! Well, also, I'll presumably have listened to more than half an inning, and hence can actually write an informed recap. Right now my analysis is about as informed as Mad Libs.

See you tomorrow!