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Oh, hello.

So, yeah, I’ve been about as prolific as that elf in Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer who wanted to be a dentist. (Not for nothing, but Hermey had a decent labor suit in his back pocket if the whole med school thing didn’t pan out.)


Yep, you guessed it, I’ve been using this time to study orthodontics!
Jk, I’ve been on a break in a non Ross-Rachel way, since my dad became sick last October. I don't want to go too into it, but suffice to say he's tackled it the way he’s tackled everything in his life: “Ok, tell me what I have to do, and let’s just get it done.” As if he’s talking about refinancing a car. He's the most amazing person I'll ever know.

And still, never ceases to awe me (as evidenced by the fact he took 15th out of 150 in a poker tourney at Foxwoods last week. WHAT WHAT. I like to brag about my dad because he makes me proud to know him.)

Okay, that said...But I digress (ah, I missed typing that.) From what I'm digressing, I'm not quite sure, but historically, if I'm blogging, I'm digressing, so I'm playing the odds here.

I figured I’d poke my head in, amid the Non-Yankee-Playoff, since I made a field trip to the Mothership today. It was sort of like making a pilgrimage to the old drinking haunt that you havent frequented since, oh I don’t know, the manager skipped off to sail the high seas. And you’re thinking, “man, I wonder if anything’s changed in my absence.”

Yeah, I entertained the notion that the Yankee Clubhouse changed in my absence. ßeither I’m rusty, or that sentence is impossible to construct with the connotation of sarcasm I’m aiming for.

(HOWEVAH, they don’t sell the worn in blue fitted Yankee caps no mo’! Double U Tee Eff, How is anyone supposed to establish him or herself firmly in true fandom if his or her hat is impossibly color-saturated??  Also—apparently using “impossibly” to modify color made a dominant showing in the Pollina punnet square.)
Not impossibly brown, Mom, since they exist.

My trip to the Yankee Clubhouse was not without incident as the entire freaking block was taped with crime scene tape. You can imagine my excitement since my first thought was Dear Diary, I’ve finally walked onto a Law & Order set! Love, Kris. As my fellow traveller Marty rightly noted, “Yeah you need a lot of juice to be able to shut down Times Square in themiddle of the day.” True dat.
I don’t think even Mariska Hagartay has that kind of clout, but someone threatening to jump off the top of Madam Toussad’s Wax Museum does. Yeah, that’s right. The tourists for once had their cameras aimed as an actual thing, as opposed to a skyscraper. And as a result, there was no way to get to the Yankee store. After all my years of toiling away in Zelda labyrinths, even I couldn’t find a way around the crime scene tape.

(Crime scene tape has been like the red rose petals of American Beauty…seems to keep quasi-poignantly popping up. And by quasi-poignantly, I mean an N of 2. Today, and also a few weeks ago when I tried to scare whoever was breaking onto my roof with this well-thought out ploy.)

Hashtag seeyagoodrelationshipwithlandlord

The guy on the roof didn’t jump. He was up there for about 2 hours, and he was talked down. That was good.

Excitement like a monkey in jello.




And I extend a very grateful thank you to my 2 travel companions today—James and Marty—as they not only did what many fear to (engage in Yankee-related activity with me), but also got me writing again, albeit in a non-recap-capacity. But, you know, I don’t want to be all Teixeira-ed out come April, and have a bunch of comments like “Oh, well she needs a good 3 months to warm up anyway…”

(Baseball reference!)


Hopefully, I’ll be back in action in about 4 months, but until then...

Novi Eboraci , vix potest ad consilium ante. 
Interdum non mihi molestus.

1 Comment:

  1. Anonymous said...
    You were missed, but I am glad to hear that your dad is doing well. It's a good thing to be proud of your parents. They raised a good kid!

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