"It's great to be young and a Yankee."

I turned on the tv to see Swisher homering. Where did this dude come from? No, seriously.

Even better was the near no-no AJ had going until the 7th. As Michael Kay pointed out at the end of the game, he put up a W after another 2-loss streak. Which says to me what the doorman at my office building was shouting maniacally the week leading up to opening day: it's gonna be really hard for the Yanks to lose more than 3 games in a row ever. That pitching line-up ain't gonna let that happen.

So far..true story.

The Yanks look endearing. They remind me of the 2006 second half of the season Yanks. Brett Gardner putting up numbers, driving in runs. Derek Jeter reminding everyone he's still a batting force by knocking a 3-run ding to break the game open. (O/U line on how long before Jeter usurps ARod's title as King of the Late Inning Pointless HR: 2.5 months).

A more confusing moment of the game= when the star of "Rookie of the Year" came to bat, under the alias Ramiro Pena. And then ropes one into left center! If BJ Upton didn't have a jetpack attached to him, that would've been magnificent.

AJ's pitch arsenal was stunning, his breaking ball was so sharp that he only walked 1, while whiffing 9. Sweet Christ. Please don't get hurt, buddy. Please.

In other baseball news, I think Kansas City is like the new Tampa Bay. A few years ago, I realized that half of my fantasy team was from the Devil Rays. And I couldn't figure out why the rockstars like Crawford, Kazmir, Upton, Huff, Young...couldn't amount to a decent team. Similarly, I realized that I was gravitating towards an abnormal amount of Royals this year (side note: Kyle Davies, Gil Meche, and Zack Greinke have let up 1 run in 20 innnings). Then I find Teahen running my 1B spot?? Whaaa?? I got scared and confused so I immediately dropped him to sidestep the whole Twilight Zone feeling of liking too many Royals. Oh wait, I picked up Kyle Davies in his stead. Dammit.

Boston lost in 12 innings. God, that sucks. (For Boston.) Not that I even remotely give .034 shits about the Red Sox, but as a baseball fan, I empathize completely with the practice of a west coast game going into extra innings only to disappoint. You're up til 2am. And for what. So this brings the Boston Red Sox's total win count to...2.

Which places the Boston Red Sox in roughly...last place.

That's all I'll say about that, since obviously it's early in the season, and I'm about 2-3 months away from closely monitoring the standings and rankings of the rest of the AL East. Run your own race. I can barely keep an eye on the Yanks as it is without worrying about whatever nonsense is going on in the AL East gutter.

But because Beckett is on my fantasy team, I do know that he is suspended for completely irrationally beaning Abreu, after standing on the mound long enough to afford him enough time to establish democracy in a third world country. Good, suspend him. My team can take the hit. I got Kyle Davies.

Ray Allen, too? Not that I follow the NBA, but Espn occasionally demonstrates a wild propensity towards New England sports and hence spotlights a story if Jed Lowrie so much as changes the lightbulbs in his refrigerator. So apparently Ray Allen graciously elbowed a Cav in the groin. He's tough.

SPEAKING OF OTHER SPORTS...NFL released the 2009 schedule! I get very wary of the NFL infringing on baseball season, but this is awesome. Opening against the Skins, too. Good stuff.

I'm into the reemergence of football, but watch--come August, I'll start getting paranoid and weird about people forgetting that baseball is still going on. "DRAFT? DRAFT??!!! HOW CAN YOU EVEN ASK ME THAT. HAVE YOU NO RESPECT FOR THE GREAT AMERICAN PASTTIME? Fine, then I'll wait til Week 4, I don't care.")

>My home opener ticket is now in the hands of the best possible person, so I'm not even toooo disappointed about missing it, even though it's slated to be like 65 and gorgeous out. MMmm, tailgating. That sounds fun. Maybe I can set up a tailgate in my apartment that will be there for me when I'm done with the knee thing. You know, what better situation to come to when you're hobbling on crutches and doped up on morphine than chicken that's been left out for 5 hours and beer bottles precariously lining all surface space just waiting to be knocked over.

Maybe I'll just plan on having a pretend tailgate. Which may work if I'm still hopped up on enough painkillers, actually.