"It's great to be young and a Yankee."

My first trip to Shea Part II...and saying the news digs are better than their old ones would be like saying Pujols is a better batter than Alex Cora. It was quite stunning in there, I was admittedly floored at how well it was constructed, in terms of accessibility and sight lines, etc.

Then there's the team it houses.

Let's cut the Mets a little slack, seeing as their entire team is basically depleted and they're playing with the understudies for "Beer League."

Not to mention that AJ and CC are pretty good pitchers. Amazing, even. (Despite what anyone has been saying otherwise. Lately it seems that people are going out of their way to opine that both of these hurlers are 100% overrated, overpaid, and worthless. This seems to make about as much sense as Mets fans breaking into "Yankees suck!" chants when the score became 5-0. If the Yankees suck, and you can't get more than 1 hit against them, what does that make you? Just something to think about, I guess.)


But I'm not too sympathetic to their hitting plights, even with the Yanks foray into offensive anorexia last week, because my feathers are getting a little ruffled with these subtle digs from opposing players about their Yanks' payroll. After the Yanks beat Florida last Friday 5-1, losing pitcher Sean West says, "It's a good lineup. The best money can buy."

Then today, Ryan Church gives us, "They had great stuff. They why they get paid the money they do."

Settle down, small fries. Just take the loss, and stop being all Boston-ed out by doing that whole knee-jerk default to the "buy your team" snark. I would much rather be seen as a team that lost rather than an embittered player who takes his cue from Boston's unique patented blend of inferiority complex and pathetic rationalizations. But to each his own, I guess.


Other game notes:

• Opposite field homeruns from Jorge and Swisher. Generally speaking, the entire team was hitting on the screws--it seemed like the ball was being roped all over the field, albeit some directly at the Mets outfielders. The Mets fans behind me realllllly stuck it to me when they said, "Yeah, those would have been homeruns in your stadium dump." I have approximately zero idea of what exactly superfan99 was going for with that.
  
• It's a good thing Posada went yard, because I think it made everyone in the world forget/overlook the fact that in the 6th inning, HE WENT UP AND TALKED TO BURNETT. I don't understand how this hasn't been the linchpin of every single game recap. How can you do that, Jorge? Why? Is that not a real superstition that athletes uphold? If Swingers has taught us anything outside the fact that Vegas, baby and You're so money will never leave the lexicon of fraternity pledges, it's that if your obsessive dumped pal goes a day without bringing up his ex, you don't mention it. And that if your pitcher's throwing a no-hitter, you don't talk to him. (at 5:10)

• Melky is one of the best outfielders in the game. His value is going to significantly mushroom in about a year, with defense becoming an increasingly expensive comodity in the league. It's not just his ability, but the discernible improvement he demonstrates every game along with the unmistakable "giving it 100%"* effort he puts forth.

• A-Rod's swing is breathtaking. It's yet another example of how superficial boxscores are, and the related dangers of using them as honest indicators of a player's performance. (That sounds a little bit like a parent of a child who banked a 810 composite score on his SATs. Maybe I'm rationalizing things because I'm so impressed with the way he hits the ball, but maybe I'm just of the mindset that when I'm playing ball, I'd rather go 0-3 with 3 line-outs to the warning track, then 1- or 2-3 with meager infield grounders. Because the former means that you're hitting. The latter means you're lucky. Contrary to what Lefty Gomez may say, I'd rather be good than lucky.)

• Fantastic team effort from the pen. Bruney becomes the latest Yankee to join the "Yeah, I got injured. So what, I'm back in spades, bitch" club. Welcome!
  


• There was a guy wearing a full Michael Jordan UNC uniform. It wouldn't have been odd to me if the dude was one of those, "Look at me, I don't give a shit what people think! Please, look at me so I can tell you as much!" guys. But rather, I think he might have seriously thought everyone who WASN'T wearing one to be weird.
  


• During the game, a moisturizer lotion sponsor had an ad play on the jumbotron that demanded, "Mets fans! Raise your hands if you got the soft hands!" So I see this little boy, no more than 4 years old and wearing a Jeter tshirt, jump up and down and wave his hands. His mother was on him like white on rice. "JASON!!! STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!! YOU ARE NOT A METS FAN. Oh my God. Unbelievable." It was awesome because she wasn't even remotely joking around.

• Second night in a row of bizarrely, surreal skies. Friday night's game looked like someone upstairs spilt all their cotton balls during a mani/pedi. And Saturday? Well, the sun just set on the Mets bats, really.
  


• It's all over but the screaming, 8th inning, 5-0. Most of the stadium's exited to catch the next LIRR or 7 train. I applaud the Mets fans who stayed, even the 2 douchebags behind me who were mindnumbingly unfunny. ("HEY! WHAT DOES MICHAEL JACKSON HAVE IN COMMON WITH RONALD REAGEN?" "WHAT?" "THEY'RE BOTH DEAD!" That was one "bit" they did. I wished my sister had been there so she could have countered with, "What does Michael Jackson have in common with the Mets? They both wear one glove for no apparent reason at all.") And around this point in the game, 2 Mets fan shuffle by me walking up the stairs in the Promenade section and I overhear one say to the other: "Is this gonna last forever?"

It was impossible to tell if he was paying homage to David After Dentist, or just asking out of Mets-like despair.



THANKS FOR COMING OUT!


*Along with "stepping up to the plate," "giving it 110%" ranks with my all-time most infuriating expressions. How can you give more than 100%? And if you can, isn't 110% kind of unimpressive? Why not 432%? Same thing goes for when you ask someone, "On a scale of 1-10..." and they answer with an emphatic "11!" 11 ISN'T ON A SCALE OF 1-10. JUST ANSWER 10 IF YOU NEED TO UNDERSCORE IT.