"With those who do not give a damn about baseball, I can only sympathize. I do not resent them. I am even willing to concede that many of them are physically clean, good to their mothers, and in favor of world peace. But while the game is on, I can't think of anything to say to them."
"Really? Yeah, I kept hearing something about that. But I feel like I've been hearing that for like the last 3 months...Seriously, every game I watch it's like, 'CC's now going for his career high 20th win of the season.' Um, did he like start the season with 19 wins?"
I love my sister.
On account of the wild fun and games that went on on Friday Night (heretoforth known as Nude Schmitt Night), I was flying a little low to the ground on Saturday, but was able to pull myself together long enough to see Round Boy achieve the elusive 20th W.
Good job, Tubby!!!
I'm actually in the office right now, listening to the CURRENT extra inning game, so in the interest of getting caught up and ensuring that I can give this game my undivided attention, here's a little ode to Fatso, from last year.
I'll be back after this game concludes, recapping it up before the BIG MANNING MANNING SHOWDOWN!
I like C.C. and I cannot lie,
You other fans can't deny,
When he takes the mound, and he's throwing down, a fastball down the pipe,
You get SPRUNG,
Gonna go all game, Cuz those pitches packing flames
Deep in the game he’s playing
I'm hooked and I can’t stop saying
Oh, CC I wanna just win one,
I don’t care you weigh a ton.
My fantasy league tried to tell me,
That gut you got will get you shelled, C.
Ooh love that slider, You say you wanna get in the Bronx, Well, strike 3, strike 3, cuz you aint that average fatty.
I've seen your changeup,
To hell with your flub. Ks, ERA, who cares how much you weigh?
I'm tired of magazines, Saying thin arms are the things,
Take the average Yank fan and ask him that, Starter’s gotta pack much fat.
So Bombers, (yeah!) Bombers (yeah!) Has your pitcher got the pounds (nom nom!)
Well throw it, throw it, throw it, throw it, throw that porker heat,