"It's great to be young and a Yankee."

Ok, we're all really excited you're here, Sneach. Seriously. And I know you think that you're just doing what you're supposed to be doing, now that you're donning pinstripes. So...good on you for trying to assimilate.

But the thing is, no one wants you to hit homeruns. Well, maybe I did a little, actually, only because I usually am listening to the radio broadcast, and out of sheer morbid curiousity, I wanted to know how Sterling was going to wrap his mouth around a long ball from you.

But since that question has since been put to bed ("Ichiro, the Yankees' rising sun, says sayonara!"), now I just want you to bring runs in. And you didn't really do that tonight.

The Yanks dropped their 3rd in a row, losing 5-4 to the ORIOLES, who I guess are kinda not that bad or something, since they're technically in 2nd place in the AL East. But, whatever, I mean, the Yankees have dropped like a hundred of their last 11 games, and I'm not saying anyone should be going into panic mode or anything, but I am saying that the Yankees need to stop acting like they're playing with house money.

Chavez and Ichiro go back to back (or belly to belly, whichever) with homeruns, and that just capped off a day of solo bombs, which is great, but also highlights a little bit of an inability to drive in runs with RISP. That's kind of important, as I understand the game.

The O's were bringing in runs the old fashioned way. Which is annoying, because the loss would have almost been somewhat more palatable if we had just been beaten at our own game. Instead, the O's beat us at the game we demonstrated an ineptitude at playing. They brought in runs with sac flies, and doubles, and even a single. (Actually, the Yankees did that, too. In the 2nd. Courtesy Chavez. Good boy.)

And similiarly, the O's had a homerun, so I guess the beginning of the game was all flip flopped or something. I wonder if Betemit misses coming out "If I Was a Better Man." Questions we may never have all the answers to.

Markakis drives in 2, and I want to forward this game recap to everyone on my old fantasy league who got alllll up in arms when my sister and I tried to orchestrate a Markakis for Crawford trade. Ok, yes it's not exactly an exercise in parity, but listen, no one ever touched Crawford. He was like my property basically. And the draft was on MY BIRTHDAY, so you can imagine my outrage when my sister picks him up with her first pick.

I sent her a ransom note demanding Crawford, and I even threw in Markakis, which I thought was more than fair, since I was basically threatening her life.

The trade got vetoed, and everyone was forever suspicious of our motives, and now look at what Markakis is doing and what Crawford is doing. Doesn't seem all too lopsided anymore, yeah?

The real tragedy of the game, however, was Tex's wrist injury. Does anyone know what the status of this is? I swear, they must be giving out free fudgiscles or something in the DL center, because people are tripping over themselves, literally, to get there.

Sweaty Freddy didn't really get the job done today, but neither did the rest of the team. In fairness, though, it wasn't an abysmal showing on the Yankees' part. I mean, there were hits. By some. Not Cano. (0 for 4). But there were hits sprinkled across the board. Jeter, Swish, Ibanez, Chavez, and Ichiro were the only ones whose bats came through.

But Sneachiro's bat didn't come through when I needed it to. With 2 runners on in the 9th, he grounded into fielder's choice, and suddenly I'm not that excited about his homerun anymore.

So the Yankees lose again, and Sweet Christ, no one needs to sound any panic alarms yet. Their lead is 6.5 games, and just as the Yankees don't need to be talked off the ledge, the O's should probably slow their roll, too, since now all of a sudden we're hearing stats about how the last time they've reached the playoffs is 19997.

I'm gonna have to default to the words of Jim Mora on this one...

PLAYOFFS???

Everyone needs to calm the f down.

Also, the Yankees need to win. I love boiling things down to black and white mandates. Who doesn't?