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It totally is. A sneach. Life is a sneach.
You know what's been missing this season? The "so-and-so isn't a TRUE Yankee" talk.

I mean, the only reason I kind of like that stuff is because it almost always is about A-Rod, and then whenever I hear someone say that about him, I get to counter with talk about the 2009 World Series.

And who doesn't like talking about that? Phillies fans, I guess. But whatever, you know what I mean.

So can we just pretend there was talk about Sneach not being a true Yankee, just so we can all jump up and down and say, WAIT!! HE IS A TRUE YANKEE BECAUSE LOOK WHAT HE DID AGAINST THE SOCKS!

Done. Problem solved. So all you Sneach-isn't-a-real-Yankee-disciples-that-don't-actually-exist...well, he is. Sneach is a pinstriped wackadoo. I'm into it.

Ok, before I jump into the game recap, I want to bring up possibly the funniest sentence the Associated Press has ever written in ever. No, not in ever. Just this season. But maybe in ever. Whatever, it's f'n hilarious:

"I thought Josh had some of the best stuff that he's had in a while," Boston manager Bobby Valentine said, fiddling with a DVD of Les Miserables on his desk.

You know what that reminds me of? This line in "The Perks of Being a Wallflower:"

All interviews say the same thing...'As______gingerly munched her Chinese Chicken Salad, she spoke of love.'"

As Bobby V fiddled with his Les Miz DVD on his desk, he spoke of his delusions.

Also, I like how the AP is going for this symbolism element. Must be an intern writing that copy. Or an English major with big dreams and a big heart.

Or a really bemused AP vet who wants to embarrass Bobby V. I don't really care which one, I just love the apostrophe either way.

So, the Yankees take 2 out of 3 from the Socks. Beckett pitched a great game, if you're looking at it from the side of the Yankees. Or if you're Bobby V, I guess. He only gave up 2 homeruns, which is good for him, but I hope he thinks long and hard (pause) about the fact he gave them up to a guy who's pushing 80, both in terms of lbs. and in terms of years of age.

There is another Japanese guy on the Yankees who, not to be outdone by Sneach, trotted out another sterling performance. 8 innings, 4 hits, 1 run (off the bat of A-Gonz, who hit another homerun. He is basically the Adam Banks of the Socks. Too bad no one can change the territory boundaries in Boston for him, so he can legally jump ship.)

R-So got another save, another shirt pull, and the pitching story for the Yankees was golden.

As for the Socks, well, they remain confident. Beckett thinks that if they play really well and everyone else starts falling down, that they're still right in the thick of things. I guess they figure that since it's already happened to them, that it could happen to anyone. But their "confidence" is on par with this.

So the Yankees take an early lead WAHOO when Grandy doubles in Jeter. Then in the 3rd, Jeter hits a ground rule double. Then after Swish walks, there's a DOUBLE STEAL, which for some reason I think is the biggest slap in the face to the opponents. Almost like swinging at 3-0. Haha, you guys are so bad, we can do things like double steals on your defense!

Next thing you know, we'll be stealing HOME or something.

Which is exactly what Jeter did. Sort of. So, not "exactly," per se. He didn't have to steal. Because Josh gave it to him on a wild pitch. Yankees 2, Playoff Ready Socks 0.

(Also of note in that inning is the fact Beckett intentionally walked Grandy, who's like 1 for 50 in the last month. But the PRS got him out of that slump, and put Grandy's mind at ease. 3 games, 3 home runs. Thanks, Socks.)

With a 2-run lead (which is never safe!), the Yankees head into the 4th and Sneach jacks one over the right field fence. Ha! Good work, new guy! 3-0. Then he does it again in the 6th. Seriously.

Text from Alex R: "Ichiro's trying to fit in. I think he's upset you call him sneachiro!"

God, I hope not. Because I have no intention of putting a cease and desist on that nickname. None, whatsoever. (Sorry, Sneach.)

The best part about Sneach's night might have actually been the next at-bat, the one where he just singled in the 8th. Because he was swinging like he was auditioning for the part of Gary Sheffield's understudy in the Broadway musical. It was insane. And awesome.

He was all giddy too, which is nice to see. I like when people aren't coy about their excitement.

All the Socks could put together was the 1-run from Adam Banks, and the game was a nice neat one to end the series. Kind of un-NYY/SOCKS-like, you know? It was like all the extra time that the Yankees usually spend dealing with Beckett and his annoying-ass molasses-like pitching style, was applied to the Pittsburgh game. 19 innings. Good grief.

I kind of didn't really want the game to end. I mean, it went that long, it's sort of a let down when someone actually scores. I would feel differently, of course, if I was a Pittsburgh fan.

In the DL world, everyone is saying the same thing about their wrists. That it still hurts, but they're hoping to be back soon, etc etc. I have a steal-trap memory when it comes to stuff that happened 12 years ago, but my short-term memory is 100% shot to hell. On more than one occasion in recent times, I've ordered takeout. Then called and ordered takeout. Within 15 minutes, having forgotten I had already just done so.

Point being is that I can only process what's immediately in front of me. Out of sight out of mind, etc. So I haven't been giving much thought to our DL-ers.

Fatso, yeah. Just because he's Fatso and all. And Mariano. Mostly because my cat is a constant reminder of him.

But Tex, Arod, Andy, et al...they're huge, some might even say indispensable. But when the Yankees are winning, I forget they're not here.

I mean that in a good way. I'm liking the team that's doing work. Jeter is hellbent on proving he's not old. Kuroda is hellbent on being just as good as the aces he replaces. (Rhyme!) Sneach hellbent on fitting in with the bomb squad. And Swish just hellbent on doing everything. I love it.

I like hellbent people. Even though it doesn't have the best connotation. WELLHELLBENT. There ya go.

Great series. 2 out of 3's better than 1 out of 3. (Math!) Yankees head out to Chi-town to play the Southsiders, who are actually also in first place. Well, this should be a good series! Provided the Yankees win. Which they will. I want vengeance for June 28.

Noli respicere post tergum. Sunt reportando in vos.

1 Comment:

  1. Anonymous said...
    Loved the imitation of Beckett by Swish in the dugout.

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