"It's great to be young and a Yankee."

At 1:27pm, I'm at my desk proofreading a manuscript for sleep-talking. Any time I write something past a certain point of healthy fatigue, there's a good chance it's littered with not typos, but with phrases like, "ghosting bartons" or something. Not spelling errors, per se. They really need something like that on Word. Like a non-spell checking checker.

So, as I'm doing that, the phone rings, and it's Keith who immediately launches into a near indecipherable tirade:

"DO YOU HAVE THE GAME ON RIGHT NOW?"

"Uh, no. Just the computer score."

"TURN ON YES. NOW! THE ANNOUNCERS ARE TERRIBLE!"

He then goes on to describe some scenario where Cano hit double that could have seemed foul at first glance, and the announcers talked about it for about 5 minutes before realizing that Cano wasn't even batting anymore, that was at second, and there was an entirely new batter up.

Javy was pitching a no-hitter pretty much right up to the point where I had to leave for my softball games. I pushed it a little, opting to take the bus instead of walking, so I could catch a little more of the game. I wasn't really thrilled about this decision when Javy let up a 2-run ding to Vernon Wells. (WHAT THE HELL? WELLS? REALLY?!)

It ended up being the only hit he'd let up in the game, walking 4 (meh) and whiffing 9 (cool!)

2-0 J's heading into the 8th.

Keith's mania started to set in again:

3:40pm "Two hit batters and two intentional walks two strikeouts a passed ball and one base hits and the announcer just said, 'the yankee offense springing to life here in the 8th' okay two base hits but hardly springing to life."

(For some reason the fact he spelled out all the numbers instead of using numerals, really punctuated the luancy of it all for me.)

Well, I usually love that about the YES announcers. They're so blindly optimistic no matter what. A-Rod could strike out 10 times in one game, and they'll remind us that "Arod generally follows 10K games with a phenomenal hit streak, so I think we're in good shape here."

Also, it should be noted, that when I was reading this paragraph on ESPN today, my aforementioned delirium came into play:

Jason Frasor replaced Downs and struck out Nick Swisher on a check-swing. Girardi came out to argue the call and was ejected by plate umpire Bruce Dreckman, which appeared to spark the Yankees.

I had to read it 3 times because I kept thinking "spark" said "spank" and the worst part was I didn't think it was THAT preposterous, the idea of the umps "spanking" someone in retaliation. They've pretty much asserted they'd like to be treated as people and not tertiary elements of the game, so I suppose this is the last vestige of self-championing?

Or maybe the funniest part of this game was that MARK TEIXEIRA GOT INTENTIONALLY WALKED TO GET TO AROD.

What the hell is wrong with everyone? Tex struck out 5 times yesterday. In literally 100% of the times Tex is walked to get to Arod, runs score.

And unsurprisingly, that's what happened today. Except this time it was on the pitcher's own doing. Wild pitch brought in tying run, Cano's 2-run double locked it up for us.

What a bizarro f'n game.

And to cap it all off, Mo was called in then sent back then called in again from the bullpen. How embarrassing. (Not really, obviously.) But since I get mortified if I have to call "I GOT IT!" when a pop up comes my way, for fear of everyone turning to look at me, I'd be so agitated if I had to turn around and go allll the way back to the bullpen because of some communication mixup with Tony Pena. See, this is exactly why I refuse to wait on line at a club, too much risk of having a bouncer send me away and I'd have to walk by all those people still on line.

Mo clearly isn't quite as unnerved by these kinds of things, as he eventually did come in and logged his 13th save in 14th tries.

Good win for the Yanks. Really happy they rallied and avoided a sweep. In other news, our softball team swept our double header and the Red Sox ended the O's 10-game losing streak. Also, it's 3am and I have about 3 hours of work left. As such, the Power Rankings won't be up til tomorrow night.

Cheers! Sleep well, Yankee fans...