"It's great to be young and a Yankee."

Didn't make it very far in this game. It was 1-0 when I dozed off, and awoke to the lunacy that was my phone activity. I think probably the worst aspect of my sleepwalking behavior may be how I use the texting function on my phone.

I've never (knockonwoodknockonwoodknockonwood) made any sleepwalking phone calls, but I have made attempts to respond to texts while I'm barely conscious.

Tonight I sent the following to Kevin, in reponse to his "Chan Ho's diarrhea strikes again":

"Lights byxakk rei 'excyse. C aaub"

Naturally.

See, I'm watching the Encore right now, to see what I missed out on. And it's the 9th inning and Chan Ho looks pretty good to me. He's already gotten 2 outs, and he's 1 strike away from ending the game. So right now I'm wondering exactly how much problems can get into with 2 outs.

Oh, ok here we go, a base hit.

THANKFULLY, I already know how the game ends, solely because of Timmy's FB message that ended with "I can go to bed happy."

Otherwise, all other txt messages would indicate the Yankees managed to blow this 6-1 lead.

Alright, so once again I watched this game backwards. Sort of. Or I watched it the way an old coworker insisted on spelling, which was "inside out." Yeah, you try wrapping your head around that. His emails would be crypotgrams essentially. the letters in the middle of the word got moved to the outside and vice versa. For example:

Yankee = Anyeke

Yeah, that was fun. And that's sort of how I've been watching these games, where I pass out mid game, and then wake up to the Encore, pass out again, and wake up to the Encore rerun.

Phil Hughes looked amazing, and in the wake of our Cliff Lee trade that never was (which I'll get into later), it really was very much a "Yeah, who needs him!" outing. He threw first pitch strikes to 21 of 27 batters, struck out 5, and became the 3rd Yankee in the rotation with 11 wins.

Mark Teixeira went yard twice, so of course I probably had him benched today. It's the non-athlete's version of slumping. A pro baseball player says that when he's in a slump, there's 100 people in the outfield, meaning no matter where he hits it, no matter how well, how hard...someone's there to catch it.

For the fantasy player, it means that when we're slumping, it seems that there's a 100 people on your bench hitting homeruns.

"Cold" Cano hit a 2-run triple to "break out" of the paltry 2-run lead the Yanks had over the M's. In fact, Seattle didn't get on the board til the 6th, with a double from Lopez that drove in Figgins.

Pauley was the last minute replacement for Lee, and I'm kinda mad about this because I remember writing something in a recap a few weeks ago:

I'm also kind of tired of everyone lionizing Lee. He's good, but I think Halladay is infinitely better. Given excessive exposure to this guy, I think the Yanks would batter him around like a ball of string. So much so that I'll go so far to say that come the 2nd weekend in July, the Yanks will chase him out of the game before he even makes it to the 5th.

To be fair, the Yanks DID to some degree chase him out of the game. They laid in the bidding and Texas took over. (Of course, my pain in the ass ex writes, "Lousy M's couldn't have waited another day to trade him.")

Maybe he should worry about his own team, rather than hanging his hopes on the Yankees failing. Especially since the Yankees 7-game streak seems more robust than the Sox 7-man DL club.

Pauley's impromptu start was actually pretty impressive. He held the Yanks to 1 run until he was pulled in the 6th, and basically what started out as another pitcher's duel, ended in a head-to-head implosion of "Whose Bullpen Can Hemorrhage More Runs in Less Time."

It was splitting hairs. It took Chan Ho roughly 14,230 pitches to end the game. Ok, to put it in perspective, it took Hughes 109 pitches to go 7 innings and let up 6 hits. Chan Ho pitched 1 inning and it took him 32 pitches to get 3 outs, while letting up 2 hits.

He is the antithesis of economic.

Anyways, tomorrow's an "early game" at 9, which will be nice. IT'S ALSO ON IN 3-D. Unfortunately, my tv barely functions with the 1 dee that it has, so I somehow doubt I'll be enjoying this experience.

My sister: "Do you need special glasses?"

"No, this isn't 1985."

Like I'm one to talk, with my tube tv. Ah well. Let's go for #8!