"It's great to be young and a Yankee."

The Yankees played like they wanted to remind the Socks with whom they were dealing.

"Just to drive the point home, this is how we score." I was going to say "this is how we drive the point (and baserunners) home," but then I remembered that there weren't a whole lot of extra base hit ribbies. Just solo bombs. For the record, I'm 100% on board with this methodology. Screw manufacturing runs.

The numbers on the score board amassed in the Yankees favor. How is that NOT manufacturing runs? I'm adding that phrase to my list of banned baseball terms. Because it doesn't make sense unless you define "manufacturing" as "scoring in the least economical way." Where does it say that creating runs precludes the avenue of long balls? I'll tell you where. NO WHERE.

So...good on you, Yankees, for manufacturing more runs that the Playoff Ready Socks.

(I'm sorry, but I'm still not over Bobby V confidently asserting the Socks are, indeed, playoff contenders. For some reason, it reminds me of this guy my sister saw on the subway, who was wearing a tshirt that said "I'm a High Roller," and he was muttering to himself while counting on fingers. What exactly he was counting was unclear, but this element of the scene was eclipsed by the fact he was saying, "Yeah...yeah! I AM a high roller! Wait, no....ok, maybe I'm a low roller. OR....no. Yeah, high- ...Okay. Wait. No, I'm definitely a middle..? No, probably a high roller." And like Bobby V, this was always done in the same non-ironic manner. This is why I love New York, and always why I hate it. No one is normal.)

Anyways, the PRS lost to the NYY, but it was a close one. Swish has been stunning this season, really just jaw-droppingly effective. But I'll get to that. You know what a premium I put on coherent, sequential narration. Nope. But I'm working on it. Also, not true. Whatever, giddy up.

Phil Hughes miraculously got the win. It's funny how the box score looks like a typo, since there's a big donut in the ER column. And anyone who didn't watch the game is thinking, "what a lazy editor! The score was 4 to 6! Kids. Always cutting corners."

(I will never cease to be fascinated by people who don't watch the game yet are interested in what the score was. I mean, it's one thing to not watch the game becaure you're just plain UNABLE to, but it's another thing to be at home doing a puzzle or something, and then the next morning you read about the game. Why not just watch it? But what's REALLY bananas is when this happens during the playoffs, and I'll be outside of Dorrians freezing while honoring the CYC-watches-game-from-outside-because-the-Yankees-scored-first-playoff-run-that-way-and-you-can't-argue-with-that-airtight-logic superstition. And someone will come up to me and be like, Hey, who won the Yankee game? "IT'S THE PLAYOFFS, WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST WATCH IT IF IT'S SO IMPORTANT TO YOU TO KNOW THE SCORE?" Annnd...this is why my last date was circa the Reagan administration.)

Oh my God, I can't believe how far I'm getting from the game. Ok. Levelset.




So in the 1st inning, Swish homered. The in the 2nd inning, Grandy and Martin went belly-to-belly, almost pitch-to-pitch-belly-to-belly, which is like a straight flush, I think. In the span of 3 pitches, the Yankees were up 3-0.

Then the 3rd inning happened. What a magical night. Lightening and thunder. It looked very "The Natural"-y. If "The Natural" was remade in 2012 with Jim Carey taking Robert Redford's role. And this was replaced with this.

Hughes had 4 unearned runs because he made a throwing error, so even when he pitches well, he throws poorly. What a weirdo!


I don't get why Pedroia's homerun isn't counted as earned though. I mean, yeah, I dislike the small fry as much as the next guy, but just because he shouldn't have been even batting in the first place doesn't mean he didn't EARN that fence-clearing shot. He hit it hard. It went far. I'd say that's well-deserved.

But I guess since Hughes threw into the outfield and let everyone in the whole world score (Aviles, Ciriaco, and Kind of Jacob-like), it doesn't count? It's not like that double-play would have ended the inning. So who's to say that the Socks wouldn't have had the same run rally with 2-outs, instead of none?

There seems to be some a little tortious about this whole thing. Like Hughes' act of throwing into center field instead of 1st, where he SHOULD be throwing, has indirectly caused harm and hence makes him liable. I'm watching too much Law & Order.

In more Bobby V-trying-out-for-the-part-of-Ozzie-Guillen-in-the-Made-for-TV-movie news, he says that the Socks let Hughes "off the hook" after "having him on the ropes." Thanks, Bob. We appreciate you and your men taking it easy on us. Let us know when you're going to play at full strength, yeah?

So after this mess of a 3rd inning when no one knew exactly what the hell had just happened, the Yankees are losing. And boy, were we mad! Mostly at Hughes because that STUPID move is gonna cost us the game!

BUT THEN, in the 5th, Jeter hit a homerun, and the fact that he tied up the game with that shot was awesome, but in terms of the grade of awesome it was, his reaction was a pretty close second.

He basically was like, Nyah, nyah. Put that in your pipe and smoke it. I never hit homeruns? Really? REALLY? Well, what do you call what I did tonight? Yeah. That's what I thought.



But, yeah, if there were any questions about homerun hitting, Crawford spells it out for us: "This is definitely a park where they hit a lot of homeruns." Totally, Carl.

Nix drove in McGehee in the 6th, and Swish went yard from the other side of the plate in the 7th. For good measure. He smiled a lot when he rounded the bases.

D-Rob and R-So brought us home, with more scorelessness (cheers to Grandy for a saving a run).

Annnd the Yankees won against the Socks and Morales. It's very telling how little Morals [sick] [sic x2] come into play with that team.

Saturday's grame features Lester v. Phelps. This should be interesting. As it always is with the GREATEST RIVALS IN SPORTS!

Some sun-is-rising-time-for-bed-see-you-in-11-hours parting words:

Facientes opus, Yanks. Fac eos clamabo.